The Power of Relationships 3

Excerpts from Maximize Relationships by Uyoyou C. Charles-Iyoha

I have no idea what relationships you are in and they appear to be limiting you; prison like in the mold of Potiphar's wife, daily harassing Joseph to sin against God and his master Potiphar. I challenge you to be like Joseph and honor God rather than the Potiphar's wife in your life. That decision may mean prison (increased financial or any other type of hardship). Do not be dismayed for God has not changed. Of a truth, your weeping will be cut short as the night will run faster than expected so that your joy will unfold to keep leaping in bounds and bounds as you settle into your rest prepared for you by God. I suggest that you pray this short prayer; Father, I plead with you to have mercy on me and move me out of the prison I am in into my rightful place, Lord in Jesus mighty name.  Whatever and wherever this prison is Lord, please help me to get out in Jesus mighty name,  Amen.

Other examples of such relationships include Samson and Delilah; Jesus Christ and Judas; Jephthah and his brothers, Jacob and Laban, Isaac and the Philistines and as many more that you know about which I will be glad to learn from you.

Even if people are not useful to you, they are useful to God one way or the other. God may need you to minister to some of their needs and He rewards you for doing so. Moses and Pharaoh make an interesting case study. Ordinarily, there will be no point of reference between the two princes yet God needed the meeting point and reference. He sent a rather unwilling Moses to Pharaoh. Pharaoh made mockery of the visit by calling on his magicians to replicate whatever miracles Moses thought he had performed by the power of God. The idea behind Pharaoh’s actions and utterances was to weaken the resolve of Moses. Pharaoh continued to capitalize on this by his refusal to let the people of Israel leave Egypt; denying them access to certain rights and privileges in addition to making life really difficult for the Israelites.

Yet, Moses persevered, visiting and making requests to Pharaoh as directed by God. Though the visits and Pharaoh’s negative responses left Moses drained, he held on because he had been with God and he knew that a victorious end was in sight. And when it was time, Moses was the one who told Pharaoh that Pharaoh would never see his face again. Please, see Genesis Chapter 10 verse 29. That was it. God had accomplished His purpose in that relationship. Moses was therefore free to walk out of the relationship, away from Pharaoh’s pride, arrogance, insolence, rudeness and oppression. Every relationship has a time span and when the end comes, the relationship ends. Some end in anger, violence, death, malice while some end in peace. Nevertheless, every relationship requires certain levels of creativity, wisdom, knowledge and understanding alongside tolerance and wit for successful navigation.

Associations foster either wealth or poverty depending on the type of associations/relationships that you keep. If you keep associating with people who are poor (poor because they fritter time and other resources, are lazy, chatter boxes) because you feel that they are underdogs, disadvantaged people who need a helping hand, then you will remain poor as most times, such poor people cannot help you out of poverty.

God’s instruction in the Bible is to give to the poor, support the poor but not necessarily hang around the poor so you are seen as a friend of the poor. If you do that long enough, you will invite the many dimensions of poverty of the poor to yourself; their inability and refusal to develop themselves; refusal to invest time through wasting time in fruitless activities. Once you have done your bit of giving money, personal development advice and whatever else you can offer to the poor, let them know that time is very precious to you and can only be traded for what brings honor or glory to God, for the salvation of the souls of men, for intercession, for money making activities, for personal development purposes and not for time wasting activities that have no purpose or meaning in life.

Most poor people actually have no understanding and value of time. That explains their poverty. Do not let such poor people decide and determine how you spend time with them, the amount of time you spend with them. Spend very limited time with them and be diligent about the business God committed into your hands. Time is money.

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The Power of Relationships 2

Excerpts from Maximize Relationships by Uyoyou C. Charles-Iyoha

Sometimes, the relationships that God allows in our lives frighten and astonish us particularly on account of the lifestyle of the people; the cruel and harsh treatment they mete out to us; the countless cries of help to God and the seeming delay in getting help from God that makes us wonder if God still exists and if He does, If He still cares about us. Hold your peace, child of God. God cares and is watching out for your best interest, ensuring that no evil befalls you while He is building your rest designed for His specific time.

Also, the person may not be exactly your first choice of a relationship partner. But if the person is brought your way for a purpose, then thank God and learn. Joseph for instance had absolutely no choice in choosing his brothers, who sold him to the Midianites traders. He was eventually sold off to Potiphar. Fortunately, Joseph understood his role as a slave and worked diligently, comporting himself in a godly manner. In no time, he became chief of staff in Potiphar's house. But just when he was beginning to savor the job, Potiphar's wife chose to be used of the devil; albeit in a very positive manner. Positive!  YES, for it was this situation that led to Joseph's imprisonment in the royal prison. That placement made the connection between Joseph and Pharaoh's chief butler which eventually culminated in Joseph being brought to Pharaoh. That was it – the jealousy and hatred by his older brothers that led to his sale to Midianites traders who in turn sold him to Potiphar's wife that led to his imprisonment were all the hand of the unseen but mighty God directing and ordering Joseph to his rest, the purpose of God for his life.

This explains why Joseph could say to his brothers in Genesis Chapter 50 verse 19 that what his brothers meant for evil turned out to be for the greater good because God intervened in the situation to work out His purposes, plans and timing for Joseph’s life. God had made a promise to Abraham in Genesis Chapter 15 verses 13 to 16. Though God did not specify at that time what land the descendants of Abraham would serve in as slaves, it turned out to be Egypt and Joseph was sent ahead by God to prepare a place for them in Egypt; ironically against the global famine of Joseph's day. Thus did the Israelites settle in Egypt, not initially as slaves but as migrants and relations of the then Prime Minister of Egypt. This was Joseph, the chief servant of Potiphar, later a prisoner and finally a Prime Minister.

Prison is prison for crying out loud and no place for prestige, honor, fame, resource ownership and position. So also is servant-hood. I believe Joseph understood all of these implications to his leadership role which explains why above everything else he desired to get out of prison and pleaded with the butler to remember him. It also explains why he comported himself well in each of the limiting positions he found himself in. It was not long before God orchestrated Joseph's exit out of those positions and put him where he rightly belonged – Prime Minister of Egypt.  It is significant to note that Joseph did not own any possessions or resources until he left servant-hood and prison to become Prime Minister. That exactly is why the devil orchestrated Joseph's slavery through his brothers; incited Potiphar's wife to ensure prison so that Joseph who had declared himself leader of his father's children would own nothing whatsoever, be a slave, a servant and a prisoner. Who bows to a servant and a prisoner? Nobody in his right mind does that and not even when you are head of the prisoners.  Joseph never preoccupied himself with owning resources while serving as a servant and as a prisoner. He preoccupied himself with getting out of prison. Beloved, it is time to get out of prison into where God purposed for you in Jesus mighty name, Amen.

When Joseph eventually got out of prison, global wealth, honor, fame and leadership were his without any struggle. He just owned what he did not sweat for; a befitting house, a wife, children, choice clothes, furniture and what have you. Joseph was free, wealthy and respected. Getting out of prison, in this case whatever limits you from achieving purpose is therefore your primary goal after which every other thing will follow.

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The Power of Relationships 1

Excerpts from Maximize Relationships by Uyoyou C. Charles-Iyoha

 Oh, the joys of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinners,

or join in with mockers. But they delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night. They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do. Psalm 1 verses 1 to 3.

There are different types and layers of relationships.  There are bread relationships; seed relationships as well as bread and seed relationships. The most significant of these relationships is God who gives both bread and seed and also empowers parents, guardians, ministers as givers of bread and seed. Parents give both bread and seed from conception through good food and rest by the mother passed into the fetus, and prayer and prophecies to the fetus. At birth, this bread and seed nurture continues with introduction to the ways of God, formal education and skills acquisition until the child becomes an adult. God on the other hand parents us with both bread and seed until eternity. He daily orders our steps into His abundant bread and seed provision, teaching us how to separate seed from bread and how to always multiply the seed. Such relationships should be celebrated.

Relationships ideally are meant to bring blessings and progress; however the devil who is the author of confusion and wickedness often attacks relationships to ensure that relationships do not bring about the desired blessings.  Therefore relationships that ideally should bring blessings bring all kinds of problems. In fact some relationships become toxic, so toxic that they drain one and eventually hasten the journey to the grave. This is because certain relationships make it easy for the devil to access and attack one. In this case, one has to be extremely careful with people who use divination, have unforgiving vindictive spirits and they live a lifestyle characterized by jealousy of their friends', neighbours and siblings’ successes. While such relationships should be avoided at all costs, there is need for wisdom to maneuver some of those relationships especially when they are blood or marital relationships.

The reason God allows certain relationships in our lives is so that certain changes can be effected in our lives irrespective of the weaknesses, strengths and negativity of the people. There may be just one or two characteristics that would make a lot of difference in your life if you will just patiently learn, be grateful for the opportunity of knowing that person and then practice and build upon what you have learnt. Once you recognize that God sends a person your way for a specific reason, I think the best start point should be to ask God what the purpose is and even if He does not say anything, then it is your responsibility to allow the Holy Spirit do His work by being wholly dependent and sensitive to the Holy Spirit. You will be amazed at how much you will learn within a short period of time especially if you are submissive to the Holy Spirit's promptings and directions.

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Utterances and Actions that Enhance Divine Destinies

Excerpts from Maximize Relationships by Uyoyou C. Charles-Iyoha

The house of God was rebuilt in Jerusalem through the prophesying of Haggai the Prophet and obedience of Zechariah, the son of Iddo as well as the Judeans that he governed. The positive declarations of these prophets, words from the heart of God strengthened the Jews, broke through and destroyed every satanic opposition and barrier. The house of God was rebuilt, normal and true worship was resumed and the people were blessed by God. Please see Haggai Chapters 1 and 2.

Barak prospered by the prophesying of Deborah. He was wise enough to associate with a wise woman who heard God clearly and delivered God’s message without diluting it. Please see Judges Chapter 4.

The associations, the spiritual environment surrounding the associations, the utterances, the intent of the heart including wishes and desires go a long way in determining divine destinies. If you stay with people who speak positive words to your life, you will be fruitful; you will fulfill purpose like the Jews.

If you celebrate light, excellence and limelight, you will be charting your own paths to excellence, limelight and greatness through associating with people of excellence, greatness and limelight. Associate with greatness, excellence, limelight by associating with people who fear and love and respect God. Those are the people that God promotes. Those are the people that God brings to the limelight. Bible examples include Abraham, Noah, Joseph, Hannah, Daniel, David, Abel, Enoch, Moses, Isaac, Joshua, Esther and Mordecai as well as Gideon and the men of war that God asked him to reduce to three hundred men. It is not that the other warriors were not skilled men of war. But in this particular war, God required only Gideon and the three hundred men so that God’s glory will not be shared with man.

If your destiny is to unfold, you must let go of certain relationships. To move to your next level, there are people you must separate yourself completely from. This is very critical for you to get to the next level God is taking you to.  Whatever it is God called you to do; you can be sure that He will give you the corresponding anointing to succeed. You can move and do that which God calls you to. Destiny separates the chaff from the grain. Build empowering relationships by identifying people with the grace of God who share in your vision. These are the people to spend time with in prayer, praise and word study.

In conclusion, relationships are very dear to God which explains why He gave several instructions in the Bible on how people should relate with one another. I believe the Bible and will do anything to live in peace with all men as instructed by the Bible. But that does not mean that I will maintain relations with people who want me to become a prostitute or drug user or an accuser of the brethren. What to do in such situations especially when they involve family members is to act with the wisdom of God.

Also, I do not believe in divorce. I believe that God can heal and save any marriage, any family no matter how bad the situation is. If He could raise a dead Lazarus about to decay from the dead, He can restore any marriage or family if He is invited in to the affairs of the couple or family. I therefore plead with couples not to walk out on their spouses, children not to walk out on their parents or other members of their family and parents not to disown their children. Some situations can be especially tacky and trying. Nevertheless, make plenty of room for the Holy Spirit to always take His place in such situations. A friend of mine discovered that her mother and her mother’s family had consistently lied to her about her paternity. She was told that her father died before she was born. But eventually, she discovered that her father was alive and she was the product of a fling. She searched for and found her father and forgave everyone involved in the cover up. Today, she is happy with both families.

While I caution against purpose limiting relationships, I also advise that you cooperate with the Holy Spirit in patiently navigating extremely difficult relationships which ultimately serve the purposes of God for your life. A great example which readily comes to mind is the Lord Jesus Christ and Judas Iscariot. Jesus knew that Judas was a thief and that he would eventually betray him, yet he chose him as a disciple. Eventually Judas served his purpose and betrayed Jesus Christ for thirty pieces of silver and Jesus was crucified, died the death of a sinner so that humanity can be saved. This does not suggest that you go look for a Judas to cut short your life. You are not Jesus Christ and will not rise on the third day.

Potiphar’s wife for instance played a very significant role in Joseph’s life. Joseph went to prison because of the lies she told. Her role would have been purpose limiting if Joseph succumbed to her temptations.  But Joseph feared and honored God and though he went to prison, all things eventually worked for good as the prison was the meeting point between Joseph and Pharaoh’s butler and baker. Though Joseph’s brothers wronged him by selling him off to Midianite traders’ on their way to Egypt, their action served in the fulfillment of God’s purpose for Joseph.

What I mean is that when the need arises; make the most of difficult people and situations. That is why I included the piece on how to make the most of difficult people in this book. Honestly, I believe I have had more than my fair share of difficult people yet I always encounter them and just when I think I am through with one, another one shows up.

Also do not get bitter, hate and hold people in unforgiveness even when they are purpose limiting. The most you can do is separate from them but never forget to apply the wisdom of God. Abraham separated peacefully from his nephew, Lot.

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The Impact of Positive Associations on Divine Destiny

Excerpts from Maximize Relationships by Uyoyou C. Charles-Iyoha

Everyone created by God is designed to be an influence on other people. This influence is at various levels starting with the family (both nuclear and extended), the body of Christ, your community, your neighborhood, the organization where you work, the friends you associate with, your peers, your school, your country and even globally. God expects you to always be a positive influence at any of these levels.

What does it mean to be a positive influence? A positive influence is anyone who influences people to do what is right through their speeches, actions, appearance and general behavior. Whether people believe in God or not, they do have an ingrained sense of what is right or wrong. How much more when people believe in God and profess to be serving God! The Bible is full of examples of people who influenced other people to positive living. Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ through His life of total obedience to God and sacrifice of Himself for the sins of humanity is recorded in history as the most influential person. Every relationship should help activate, nurture and fulfill God's plans and purposes in your life. For instance, Jesus Christ spent a great deal of time with God in prayer, His disciples in teaching sessions and imparting kingdom principles to them.  These are the people who took over the baton when He exited planet earth.  This is not to say that He did not spend time with other people.  But the bulk of His time was spent with people who mattered to His plans and purposes.

The Apostle Paul was also an influential person in his time and his influence continues through the many books he wrote in the New Testament. He also mentored a good number of people who became positive influences in their day and time.

Even young people can also mentor other people if they excel. Timothy was a very young man yet he was a Bishop. The Apostle Paul left him in Ephesus to put things in order and correct the people that were walking in error. Additionally, Paul charged Timothy to be a good mentor by being a good example. Please, see 1^st Timothy Chapter 4 verses 12 to 16.  Besides, the Bible records that Timothy imitated Paul who mentored him. Please see 1^st Corinthians Chapter 16 verses 10 to 11.

Ruth associated with a positive person, a person who loved God and was associated with God. She ended up becoming a descendant of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Joseph: not a single reference is made to him associating with the wrong set of people, people who in no way impacted his life.  As a slave, he lived with Potiphar, Captain of the Guard. Joseph was exposed to royal etiquette and living. He learned fast and was subsequently promoted.  Desirous of cutting short Joseph’s trip to the top, Potiphar's wife offered Joseph spiritual poison coated in supposedly palatable terms. Conscious of his divine ascent, Joseph declined.  Though that earned Joseph a prison sentence, it was the royal prison he ended in and again, his gift and divine linking up showed up.  He was promoted. He interpreted dreams for the appropriate people and not just anybody.  He interpreted dreams for people who could link him to the very top.  Though it took two years, Joseph was eventually introduced to Pharaoh. He interpreted Pharaoh’s dreams accurately. Joseph was made Prime Minister in a foreign land.

Rahab chose to associate with the Israelites and was spared when Jericho was burnt down.

There is great wisdom and power in cultivating empowering and positive life transforming relationships divinely arranged by God to help in fulfilling God's plans and purposes for your life.

Choose to prosper through the people you associate with. Therefore, connect to the relationships God is bringing your way. Choose your friends wisely based on where you are headed. Examine your relationships and shed some if need be. Like Daniel and friends, Mordecai and Esther, Ezra and Nehemiah, form empowering relationships and stick to them. The whole essence of relationship building is for profits and not boundary delineations. Therefore, seek sanctifying persons, events, activities and relationships. As you do this, no one can steal the presence, power, blessings and wealth of God that you carry. Build empowering relationships by identifying people with the grace of God who share in your vision. These are the people to spend time with in prayer, praise and word study. Identify Spirit filling activities, relationships, events, persons and stick to them.  Invest quality time in daily Bible study, meditation, prayer/praise worship, church services, prayer meetings, spending quality time with God, as well as inviting the Holy Spirit to fellowship with you. These are life building persons, activities, events. These add value to your life.

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Be Fruitful and Multiply

  Excerpts from How to Overcome Oppositions by Uyoyou C. Charles-Iyoha

God is the one who makes a person fruitful and grants the grace for multiplication. To multiply means to increase very much in number or amount/to reproduce in larger numbers/to make something do this. To be fruitful means to produce many useful result (land or tree) producing a lot of crops.

The ability to produce many useful results is an innate and divine capacity given to you by God at creation (Genesis Chapters 1 verse 28; 9 verses 1, 7; 7 verses 6, 2, 20; 35 verse 11) and that same God commands that this innate capacity to produce many useful results should be scaled up, increase the number to as many as can be - be fruitful and multiply (Genesis Chapter 1 verse 28). Increase the number to the point where you can fill the earth with what you are reproducing so that you can have dominion – controlling shares. This is to say that God has already endowed you, blessed you with the capacity to produce many useful results. Your responsibility then is to increase the number of these many useful results to fill the earth to the point where you can have dominion – to rule over.

Anytime we activate the innate capacity to be fruitful and become fruitful indeed, what follows is multiplication that leads to abundant increase. Please see Exodus Chapter 1 verse 7, Genesis Chapters 26 verses 12 to 1; 49 verse 22 and Deuteronomy Chapter 8 verse 13. Fruitfulness ensures multiplication. If you are not fruitful, you cannot multiply and increase. Therefore be fruitful so that you can increase.

However, fruitfulness, multiplication and abundant increase are processes, in point of fact daily processes which culminate in abundant increase. They do not happen in a vacuum and do not drop on anyone like a bag of cherries. They happen through progressive acts of fruitfulness and multiplication.

Every day, every week, month, year is a time of great increase, abundance, progress, great prosperity as long as you engage in activities that are fruitful and self seed to multiplication and great increase on a daily basis. Therefore, focus on and engage in these activities rather than running around in frustrating circles. You are on track with God as you daily plant His word, do your work along your divine purpose and ask God for His blessings. God is not the author of confusion. The devil is which explains why he brings a zillion options that you cannot even choose one from. God on the other hand gives blueprints and opens doors in unlikely places and makes a way where there is no way. There is no dead end in Christ Jesus because He is the Way, the truth and the Light – the way for direction, the truth to know the appropriate and relevant things to do in that  direction, the Light to guide you in that direction. All the guidance you will ever need to live a purposeful life in Christ Jesus is embedded in the Word of God that is the light and the truth you need which God has graciously provided through Christ Jesus.

Stop trading what is of value for what is not of value. God is the one who makes a person or family fruitful – Genesis Chapter 17 verses 6, 20. He is also the one who makes a person or family multiply – Genesis Chapter 26 verse 4; 28 verses 3 to 4.

Joseph in spite of being a slave in Egypt was fruitful and progressively multiplied. He did not allow the circumstances he found himself in to affect his relationship with God. He maintained his fervent relationship with God and was grateful to God. Consequently, God was with him and prospered him by giving him favor for leadership positions in addition to blessing the work of his hands. His relationship with God also dovetailed into his positive attitude with everyone he came in contact with and related with. For instance, despite being imprisoned for an offense he did not commit, he was nice to other prisoners, noticed their mien and proffered to help them when he discovered what their problems and challenges were. He interpreted the dreams of the butler and baker and in the process of time, that paid off handsomely for Joseph as the need to interpret bigger dreams at higher levels came and Joseph was remembered as the person who could interpret dreams. With that, Joseph achieved his dream of global leadership.

Beloved, do you have exceptional skills, talents and divine ideas with which you can bless humanity? Deploy them irrespective of the negative circumstances you find yourself in. Bless humanity with them as the Spirit of God leads you to do so. With time, God will promote you to His desired peak for your life in Jesus mighty name. 

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